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But we loved her in spite of all that, or maybe because of it.
Lets start by reminiscing.
What do you remember about your audition?
I thought it was sci-fi, and I hate sci-fi.
What originally drew you to the part?Shane made sense to me.
I admired her in a way, her self-possession and her unapologetic approach to who she was.
She had a lot of male tendencies in a female body.
You couldnt really place her in this box of female characters that existed at the time.
And thats what I liked about her.
And with Shane I thought, Oh, I just get to be my tomboy self.
I feel like there still hasnt really been another character exactly like Shane on TV.No, there hasnt.
Not in the things that Ive watched.
And it was just this immediate synergy.
We were all very different from one another, but it just made so much sense.
I think thats what made the puzzle fit so beautifully.
I was so young.
I remember going outside with Mia Kirshner to smoke cigarettes, back when you could still smoke.
How old were you?I was 24.
And were you out at that point, even to yourself?No.
Its wild to think about you playing that part and not knowing that about yourself.Yeah.
Ive always been a late bloomer.
This seems like my tribe.
Im so glad that I never, ever questioned that.
And she bestowed upon me this gift of playing her.
But how do you play that, right?
I remember thinking that to myself when we were shooting the pilot.
My cousin has this great saying, The best game is to have no game.
I think that was the origin of how I figured out who Shane was.
She didnt have a game.
So when did you come out and start dating women?Well, it happened throughout.
Leisha Hailey called it out instantly, but it took me a second to catch up.
Leisha is also a very perceptive person.
And there was this fishbowl effect.
And I dont even know why.
But I do remember feeling uncomfortable.
To help you sell a magazine and for you to take credit in getting me to say it first?
Im not going to play that game.
Im going to figure out who I am first.
When someone pushes you to do something, whats your immediate reaction?
I think thats human instinct.
At least, its mine.
When someone is pushing me to do something, Ill always push back and resist.
That feels very Shane.Well, were one and the same.
A brief laugh.]
My friends know me as who I am.
But would I get called out on the street as Shane?
Yeah, all the time.
I dont even know if people know what my real name is sometimes.
I guess I did my job if people are conflating the two.
But if you get to know me, Im not her.
Shes way too cool for me.
I feel like I have to work for the things that I do.
I will say playing such a self-possessed person for six years really brought me into my center.
It gave me the inner confidence to embrace who I was.
Characters that the audience loved would leave the show, then the new one would come in, right?
And then that relationship has its issues and would inevitably end, too.
What are her redeeming qualities among all of these emotional flaws that she has?
Like Carmen for instance.
Sharmen forever.Sarah Shahi is one of my favorite people in the world.
Sarah is just magic.
Shes just a little piece of magic in human form.
And when Shane left Carmen at the altar, that was pandemonium.
I didnt want Sarah to leave either.
And how do you redeem yourself from that?
I think it was the overthinking that gave me apprehension.
I dont think Shane is a very easy character to write.
Where was she now?
Leisha had an idea, she knew that Alice was going to be running a talk show.
Jennifer knew that she wanted Bette to run for mayor.
Those two had their thing, and with me, its like, Shane could really just be anywhere.
So you got married in 2017.
What does your wife think about you returning to the role?Oh, shes fine with it.
She used to watch the show back in the day.
Is there any character on the show that she reminds you of?Oh, Bette.
At least financially, in the revival, Shane seems like shes in a very different place now.
But romantically, shes kinda back where she used to be.
But she still is who she is.
She cant have it all together.
So thats how I approached it: At her core she continues to be who she is.
Did you all stay in touch?Oh yeah, for sure.
Leisha is my best friend, we talk every morning before 9.
Mia Kirshner used to call us pants, because you couldnt have one leg without the other.
And Jennifer always stays with me when she comes to L.A. Shes my big sister.
We forgot about it for so many years.
But we only could get through a couple of episodes and we were sweating.
I think I got the flu.
We were both just like, We cant watch this, its not helpful.
I dont like to watch myself.
Youre thinking, Oh God, I did this however many years ago, and it was different.
I was younger and I was in a different place.
But then you get to set and youre wearing your costume.
And the first day at work, I had a scene with Leisha and Jennifer at a cafe.
