The Real Housewives of Atlanta
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Some episodes just exist to set up a larger, bigger fight.
Some episodes are just here to lay the foundation of the conflict to come.
Some episodes arejust fineand this was one of those episodes.
One of the reasons it wasokaywas because it centered around Tanya.
Listen, Im not mad at Tanya.
We all gotta have that one friend who is too perky and cheerful for her own good.
If this were middle school, Tanya would get to school early on your birthday to decorate your locker.
Tanya brings light and joy and happiness.
BUT I DO NOT WANT THAT ON MY EPISODES OFREAL HOUSEWIVES.
I dont need my Housewives to be all negative.
I love a moment of grace and levity.
I love Sonja Morgan going to the grocery store with a face mask on.
I love Karen Huger eating a peach like its a butt.
I love Porsha Williams cracking open walnuts with her thighs.
Something fun, something weird, somethingHousewives.But it cant all be whimsy and mirth.
The world needs more Tanyas.
We have enough Yovannas.
Lets get to it.
Theres a few things that have to get done before the trip.
Porsha meets her sister to pick up some NARS.
(Does anyone actually wear NARS Orgasm or is it just a marketing ploy?)
Porsha had a good therapy session with Dennis and hes ready to put her ring back on her finger.
Porsha says theyre not officially back together she hasnt made any decisions yet but theyre in a better place.
The fact that Eva tries to pretend that she didnt say this incredibly specific thing is preposterous.
Eva can be a shady bitch all she wants, but she needs to SIT IN THE SHADINESS.
Theres very little narrative thrust in this episode!
Its 6:45 a.m. and everyone has a full face of makeup.
Marlo just had foot surgery so she cant wear heels.
Eva is trying to prevent a preterm birth.
Tanya freaks out about Cynthias ring and we should all be freaking out.
Eva arrives and Tanya says, This baby bump is everything.
This is too cheerful and supportive for 6:45 in the morning.
The first topic of conversation at the airport is if NeNe is coming.
When Yovanna arrives, Eva goes, Im sorry, why is she here?
Yovanna is wearing a jean jacket that says BITCH on the back.
Yovanna is the anti-Tanya.
To put everyone in good spirits, Porsha pulls out a flask with a few drops of Hennessy.
Kenya is VERY concerned with how she got the Hennessy on the plane.
Once they arrive at the hotel, Tanya says theyll be staying for three days.
THESE TRIPS ARE ONLY THREE DAYS?!?!?
I could not deal with all this travel and production for just a three-day trip.
Im bringing one pair of pants and one shoe.
The ladies head up to theirIDENTICAL ROOMSto decompress before the dance lesson Tanya organized.
Cynthia, Kandi, and Kenya have some wine and chat about NeNes cheese-tray gift.
Then Kenya casually asks if they enjoyed their date night.
Who is this man?
Cynthia asks from behind a riot shield, Are you happy?
Is this man bringing you peace?
and Kenya says that theyre in a low place right now and breaks out into tears.
He is not bringing peace.
That is not something Marc brings.
I think Id be Kandi in this dance class.
They all head upstairs after the dance class for a drink and some snacks.
Tanya is excited because she knows NeNes surprise arrival is looming.
Eva says that she has absolutely no memory of talking shit about Porsha.
She basically enters a blackout state when she starts throwing shade and doesnt remember anything shed said.
Dont worry: Bravo plays a montage of the exact thing Eva doesnt remember saying.
Eva apologizes and Porsha says shes going to process that apology and accept it when it feels right.
Cynthia brings up that Kenya basically spoiled Mikes proposal and Mike was upset.
So instead of being supportive, she tries to undermine her friends relationship success.
And is met with crickets.
