Vanderpump Rules
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Then he tells Lisa he had a beer with his father to celebrate being so good.
Hmmm, I wonder what the match was that set Jamess Hindenburg ablaze?
(Heres a hint: It was his parents.)
That is pretty close to the textbook definition, but James hasnt hit his rock-bottom quite yet.
Without him, the Tom Tom opening goes off mostly without a hitch.
The Toms wear matching white suits and print shirts and its just absolutely adorable.
Its a really cute stunt, but Im with Ariana, couldnt we have just rented one?
How often does one need a motorcycle and sidecar?
He also unwraps his presents from Tom: Oh, you got me gloves.
Oh you got me a goggles, I love goggles.
Its like Tom Tom of Finland up in that piece.
At the big table they have the same waiter I had when I visited Tom Tom.
Of course, nothing about the Tom Tom opening is good for Katie.
Katies upset because Schwartz isnt giving her enough attention during the opening.
Im sorry, Katie, but this is not your night.
Your name is neither Tom nor Tom.
You do not work in this part of Lisa Vanderpumps Epcot for Housewives fans in WeHo.
Go back to your own part of the amusement park if you want everyone to fawn over you.
Its sort of like when your partner has a 30th or 40th birthday party.
Maybe he wins an award at work.
Maybe he is in the finals of whatever bullshit after-work sporting league hes in.
When she walks on the plane, she literally says, Will you switch with me?
and he says, No.
That was the dumbest thing I have ever seen a human being do in my life.
Secondly, my partner is not Katie.
Katie, on the other hand, is a bottle full of rage with no cap.
I imagine the latter, which makes me wonder how all of that hatred didnt blow off Toms leg.
Shes just as bad as Kristen.
Well, she looks like an asshole anyway, and Tom tells her as much right to her face.
Yeah, man, Sandoval said.
And this was supposed to be our honeymoon.
Maybe it can be still, Schwartz said.
Once inside, they started making out furiously.
Im going to do awful things to you, Sandoval said in between kisses.
Schwartz, even more turned on, pinned his friend against the wall and kissed him even harder.
I love the sound of your voice, he said to Sandoval.
Call me by your name.
Tom, Sandoval said.
Tom, Schwartz said back.
Tom, he repeated as he turned to face the wall.
Tom … Tom … Tom … Tom …
