Vanderpump Rules
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That means those same camerapersons and producers should not go to bed until Kristen does.
Its like she was those creepy twins fromThe Shiningcombined into one infinite maw of need and regret.
Where is this footage?!
This is exactly the same reason they missed Stassis birthday freakout.
I know that the staff is tired and probably has union contracts.
Most of this episode, however, is about unhappy unions.
But since we started with Kristen, lets talk about her and Carter.
(Remember, Kristen ostensibly has no job other than running her line of despirational T-shirts.)
Then she tells Stassi that she doesnt want to say anything because, Its not always shitty.
Girl, that is the wrong attitude.
If you cant get along on a daily basis, stop trying to make it work.
Even Stassi yes,Stassi agrees with me.
There is a relationship out there you deserve.
Is this what happens after Jax cheats on you for years on end?
Eventually the Blue Fairy comes and turns you from a turd puppet into a real person?
I hope that is the case for Brittanys sake.
Watching Stassi and her boyfriend Beau together is so weird because theyre happy, functional, and lovely together.
I dont even understand who this Stassi is.
Kristen tells Carter that she doesnt like when he barks and cusses at her.
He tells her he does that because all she does is complain.
She informs him that, as her boyfriend, listening to her complaints is part of his job.
Carter then tells her that they just disagree about things and that is just the way they are.
I feel like a lot of couples feel this way and that is an incorrect assumption.
Things shouldnt be that way.
A couple shouldnt be sniping and picking at each other all the time.
The biggest issue here seems to be that Kristen wants things to change and Carter does not.
They want different things and, for that, Kristen should dump his ass and find someone new.
Maybe Max, Lisas son, who is single.
If Kristen wants to piss Lisa off, that is a good way to do it.
There is also trouble between Lala and her man Rand.
So could her boyfriend.
So could Blackout Schwartz or Tequila Katie or Krazy Kristen or Beer Tears Stassi or Allergic to Tequila Brittany.
Moderation seems like a completely foreign concept to all of these people.
That is why I love Lala.
The final relationship in trouble is the one between Lisa and the Toms.
She basically tells them, If your shit stinks, its off the menu.
This is what we call in screenwriting class creating stakes.
The thing is, Tom and Tom should be excited to have an expert come in.
But Lisa doesnt frame the visit this way.
She looks like k.d.
She is, in fact, theFifth Non-Blonde.
She teaches them about cocktails and says that ten of the Tomss cocktails made the menu.
Its like when the weatherman crows about a hurricane that never arrives.
It doesnt make us relish the suspense, it makes us reject the disappointment.
Suddenly a swift breeze blew in from the open window and up his loose cotton bedwear.
He felt a steady rising in his groin as the pants tented ever and every skyward.
Just then the phone rang and a picture of Tom Schwartz flashed on his screen.
Beau thought for sure a phone conversation could distract him from this stirring.
Tom asked Beau a question which made Beau look down at his still tented pajama bottoms.
Yeah, Im, hehe, up for it.
Come on over, he said and then hung up the phone.
Looks like potato salad was off the menu.
